Sunday, November 6, 2011

News Bites November 2011


MO NO MO'

Moammar Gadhafi is no more. One man's terrorist is another man's terrorist....
                                                .....or cross dresser.                                                 

HERMAN CAIN IS A FRONT RUNNER

He wants to change the tax code with his 999 plan.
 He also wants to change the food stamp program so that they are only good at Godfather's Pizza.

THE WEDDING

I now pronounce you, Kim Kardashian, and you, Kris Humphries man and...
                    ....ex-wife. I guess that ass isn't all it's cracked up to be.

HEAVYWEIGHT

Christina......
                                        .....is about to eat the audience.

OCCUPY LA

                           It's not occupied, there's still plenty of vagrancy 

MONEY IS NO OBJECT
Justin Bieber rented out the entire 20,000 seat Staples Center to have dinner in the center of the arena with girlfriend, Selena Gomez. He then rented a movie theater to catch a flick with his girl. What's next? Inside sources tell us that "The Beib" has instructed his peeps to reserve the Garden of Eden for his engagement party.


NEW SHOWS

 X-FACTOR:
It should be called "Drug Addicts, Cripples (OK, physically challenged) and Washed Up Losers Sing the Blues". Singing isn't enough for this show. You also need some kind of sappy human interest story which I'm not interested in. Bah humbug.

KIM KARDASHIAN'S FAIRY TALE WEDDING:
 This should have been called "A No Talent, Self Absorbed, Unappreciative Fat Ass with a Sex Tape Marries a Neanderthal."  I think three wedding dresses and Kris signing an "I get nothing" pre-nup says it all.

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