Hear ye! Hear ye!
OK, so whether you girls want to admit it or not, Valentines Day is really just a day for the women. Guys pretend to be into it because if the don't they won't get any for a month, and if they do they'll get some that night. Not really much of a choice.
That being said, I think guys should have their own day. It's been suggested that Superbowl Sunday is just for the guys, but everyone knows that chicks like beer and football just as much as guys do, they just won't admit it.
This new day shall be known as Malentines Day and the symbol will be an upside down heart on an upside down golf tee (a spade for those of you with limited imagination). It shall symbolize how much men love golf, which for some reason they all do sooner or later.
Golf looks like a stupid game but I played a couple of times and it was fun. I just don't understand why everyone has to be quiet when someone tees off. Fifty thousand people can scream at the top of their lungs while a baseball player tries to hit a rock hard ball that's being thrown at him in excess of 90 mph and there's no problem. If you sneeze while a golfer is teeing off they slap you in the face with a pair of gloves and ban you from the country club. I don't get it. But I digress.
While Valentines Day has cupids, we shall have stupids. A cupid is a little chubby boy with wings who shoots an arrow into the heart to make someone fall in love. A stupid is an old, unshaven, fat man with wings who shoots an arrow into the heart of the girlfriend/wife to make her forget all the stupid stuff the guy has done in the last year.